frustrated

new semister is just few hours away but im still don't know what im gonna do in the next week. manager declared that there gonna have two exits for students who fail to pass the exam. no1: pack your bags and go home. no2: pay another 8000 bucks and do the bridging again. how about me? truth is i failed to pass and i wont re-do the bridging and wont pack my bag either. i applied release before the exam, problem is bradford didnt want to free me at that time, so i tried withdraw directly from bradford. hopefully i will receive their response in the coming couple of days. see, probably im gonna fucking around for the next fews days.


i met a pretty, female falungong missionary yesterday when i was eatting underground at the food court in myer. she tried to disseminate all kinds of positive things related to falungong and poured out lots of evil conducts done by ccp. it's obvious that she's trying to induce me to be their fellow, im not that easy to be fooled anyway. then in roundle mall after lunch i met a propaganda about the shenyun art performance. it was my first time to get so close to this event. i did know that before i came to australia but i didnt have closer involve than just through internet. according to various feedbacks, i predict shenyun art performance wont disappoint me so im thinking about perchasing a ticket.


i had a short conversation with my sweet this afternoon. though it finished in very short period of time i still felt warm and comfortable. i miss my sweet all day long, i just cant drive her away from my heart. i told her that im struggling these days and a little bit frustrated 'cause i wanna do something real to prove myself very much but the current situation doesnt allow me to do anything expecpt spending money and fucking around. i think im just killing time. i've realised about it but i can do nothing. nothing's gonna worse than this. she conforted me and told me to change my view. it probably be better if i consider nowadays as a day-off when i can do nothing to it but to accept the truth. yeah maybe. i have no choice after all.